


I Am More Than Willing to Die

by wanderingsouls



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: two of the Blade's have names that i randomly made up because i felt like it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-21
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-07 15:25:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13437684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wanderingsouls/pseuds/wanderingsouls
Summary: Keith forgets how loyal he is and that scares a lot of people. Mostly, the people he is loyal to.





	I Am More Than Willing to Die

**Author's Note:**

> As soon as I finished the fourth season I wanted to post this but it took me forever to get this out on top of other ideas running through my head. I hope everyone knows what scene I was referring to in this little piece of writing and hope it's enjoyable.
> 
> I posted this really late, so my grammar may be off. I apologize in advance and hope you all enjoy this little piece.

  


"Sacrifices must always be made in a war!" Kolivan barked as soon as the seven members of the mission boarded the ship and took off. He was purposely outing Keith in front of the others to embarrass Keith. (Keith only felt embarrassment when he flinched at Kolivan's voice.)

 

"I _know_ that." Keith said bitterly, all too aware of the others pretending to not pay attention to the scene but secretly were.

 

"No, you do not." Kolivan said. Kolivan pulled his hood down, his mask disappearing, and turned to face Keith in all his anger and disappointment.

 

"If you knew, you wouldn't have pulled that stunt back there."

 

Keith clenched his fists and tightened his jaw as he felt anger churning in his veins and blazing over his entire body. Stunt? He called saving fellow Blade members a stunt?

 

"I told you-"

 

"What you told me, was a lie. Yes, Fask and Lera had what we came for and had been greatly outnumbered, but you forget, every Blade is ready to die. We do not expect another to always come to our aid in battle. What you did could have compromised this entire mission!"

 

Keith knew this already. It had been one of the first things Kolivan had told him when he joined the Blade of Marmora. Keith felt he had grown to follow these rules except for a few missions. There was just some part of him that seemed to keep failing that rule.

 

"But it didn't. It worked out in the end." Keith stood up straighter, trying to calm his anger with even breaths like Shiro taught him, and glared Kolivan dead in the eyes. He wanted Kolivan to see his anger and to see that he was wrong. You always save your team; _always_.

 

"Your loyalty is admirable as it is endearing, but what you did was unacceptable." Keith opened his mouth to make a retort but Kolivan beat him.

 

"This is not Voltron, Keith. We do not follow by your friends' codes. Do not do this again. That is final." He turned away from Keith and began talking to other members aboard the ship about something Keith didn’t care to listen to.

 

Keith breathed deeply as he glared at the back of Kolivan's head, grateful he had kept his mask on to hide the emotions crossing his face but feel like Kolivan proved a point more so from it. He looked away from Kolivan, exasperated, tired, and longing for something he pushed away to look at the two he had come to aid in the nick of time.

 

They gazed back at Keith, masks still on.

 

"One day, that loyalty is going to get you killed."

 

***     *     ***

 

In truth, Keith forgot how loyal he was and how much he hated himself for getting attached in the first place.

 

He'd forget that the reason he listened to Shiro was because the latter meant him no harm and sometimes Shiro said random things that made a smile appear. (Shiro needed to smile more often. It was becoming rare.)

 

He'd forget that he'd get tools for Pidge, whenever she was hyper-focused or complained she was too lazy to move, because she was clever, and he wanted to support that. (Even though she was aware of that, but Matt had told them of the kids who’d make fun of her in school. So, Keith became Pidge’s other brother.)

 

He'd forget that he'd listen to Hunk ramble about his latest idea or thought because it made the other boy happy and at ease when he had someone else to hear him speak instead of himself. (Lance and Hunk were talkers and Keith found it endearing.)

 

He'd forget that he trusted Lance with his life because Lance was the bishop on the board of ever mission and he never failed to make checkmate. (Keith wanted him to see that.)

 

He'd forget that he'd listen to Coran's stories because they were interesting and one of the few things he had of a dead planet. (Coran also liked to listen to their stories which made Keith feel loved.)

 

He'd forget that he gave Allura a squeeze of the shoulder and a quiet, "I get it." when he’d catch her visiting her father’s old A.I. chamber because she lost everything and held shoulders like they never faltered. (Keith admired her.)

 

He was loyal, and it was concerning because he wasn't supposed to be loyal. Loyalty meant he was attached and when you get attached, you run the risk of rejection and Keith couldn't handle any more rejection the world had to offer.

 

He was loyal, and it was going to get him killed one day.

 

***     *     ***

He’s crying because he’s alive.

 

His hands cup his face as tears pour from his eyes. His throat letting out a series of wails that make him grateful he muted the com link, so no one can hear. Their voices are a background noise to his shock and a reminder of what he almost died for. Broken wails and sobs cloud over their voices for a solid five minutes before he’s left as a shaking mess as their voices come back.

 

Keith lifts his head, rub his eyes, and looks out into space as the ships colors bare into his vision; outlining the cosmos in a haze of red.

 

He sniffs and feels his throat try to hold back another sob and fail miserably. His nose is wet and dripping snot, so he uses his hood to wipe it. Keith allows himself to finally tune into the chatter.

 

They’ve concluded he turned the com off and are telling Keith they’ll wait at the castle. Lance asks why they think Keith did it, but no one has an answer. _So, Matt hasn’t told them yet._ Keith listen to their voices for a while longer until I see Lotor’s ship coming towards the Castle of Lions.

 

_I almost died for them. I would have died for them if Lotor hadn’t come and broken the particle barrier._

 

It feels...weird to still be alive, Keith thinks as he pilots his ship back to the Castle of Lions. He can feel how his body is still processing that. His heart's still pounding a countdown until impact. His body is still tense, waiting for that impact. His mouth is still dry, holding in the breath he thinks will be his last.

 

He’d pulled a “stunt” again, but he’d do it without again in a million lifetimes, in a never-ending Groundhog Day, because sacrifices and loyalty go hand in hand when there’s a war and Keith’s loyalty was going to kill him one day

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you very much!


End file.
